An Open Letter to Janay Rice

Janay,

My heart broke for you and your family upon seeing the now infamous video. It turned my stomach and physically pained me to see you had endured that type of brutality at the hands of someone you love and supposedly loves you. I know your husband has been villainized in the public eye and now because of the public's outcry about the incident, your husband has lost his job. It is sad and utterly unfortunate that the sins of one would reverberate so far and wide. I'm sorry that the emergence of this new footage has scraped up an incident you thought you began to heal from. I'm sorry that you feel assaulted again.

There are some of us out there that gain nothing but a heavy heart from being witness to what was one of the darkest moments of your life. We saw things that usually stay buried in the recesses of some unfortunate couples' closets; almost never seeing the light of truth; until it's too late. Until the story is not of an indefinite suspension and counseling program, but the funeral of a beautiful young woman who had "so much to offer", and the murder trial of a once "promising young athlete" similar to Cherica Adams and Rae Carruth.

In that horrible horrible video Janay, many of us saw our sisters, mothers, aunts, and best friends being assaulted and we were angered and outraged. We later heard your apology while sitting next to your husband and heard the believable excuses of a thousand battered women swelling; overflowing and oozing from the gashes and various other wounds on their bodies and in their spirits. You are not the first and definitely won't be the last to excuse your abuser's behavior. You are not the first to take the blame but I want you to know you couldn't have done anything to provoke the cowardly and merciless act that rendered you unconscious.

Janay, this video may have saved you no heartache but it's publication (whatever the reason behind its release) may have saved your life! I do understand your frustration that your situation to some, was merely a sensational, money making, capital venture that left you victimized again; picking up the pieces of your husband's now obliterated career and your dignity off that elevator floor. How lowly and base a person has to be to gain from your pain. But now, we, the public are forced to deal with this and cannot hide behind the All American sport of football with it's "good ol' boys" unwritten rules that say only address problems if they're exposed by sleazy irreputable news sources like TMZ.  I cannot imagine the immense amount of pain you must feel.

I am distraught that instead of rallying around you Janay, many fellow women have taken this opportunity to berate, bash, and malign you and your decisions. Shame on them for being so anonymously flippant in their comments underneath articles that could never tell the whole story. Shame on them for publicly cursing you from the cozy cocoon of their Facebook pages. Shame on the memes and insensitive quips and jokes made at the expense of your humaness. How is it we live in a day and age where the victims continue to be victims over and over and over again? Once by their attacker, second by the judicial system often, and third by the court of public opinion. I guess "First World" doesn't equal "First Class". I dare say the ones that are so vocal in their criticisms of you may also be suffering their own silent torment (be it past or present) and have used you as the proverbial whipping boy to deflect from their own abusive situations.  What a sad and crippling cycle abuse can suck people into.

Respectfully, no one would want to walk a mile much less the length of a floor tile in your shoes. So, on behalf of you Janay Rice, I ask every decent, compassionate human being to rest their stones for a moment of silence amid a stadium's worth of incessantly empty commentary on your life. We will never come close to knowing the pain you suffer. And once that pregnant pause passes, I ask all women, men, and anyone in-between with voice, to stand up and fight for those whose voices have been stripped, manipulated, and beaten from them. From victim to victor is my prayer for you Janay.

Best Wishes for you and your family,
Fiery Wife

Emotional, Sexual, and Physical abuses are never OK. If you are suffering abuse please visit: http://www.thehotline.org/ or call 1-800-799-7233. If you suspect a loved one is suffering abuse please visit: https://www.dosomething.org/actnow/actionguide/help-someone-your-community-who-experiencing-verbal-emotional-or-physical-abuse

Sickle Cell Awareness Month!!!!!Cleverly Changing Interview Questions

Kids, we're taking a field trip today!!!!!I had the honor of being interviewed by Elle from Cleverly Changing. I love what Elle is doing over there!!!! Please check out the interview regarding Sickle Cell Disease, being of mixed ethnicities,Youngest Son, and how our family is learning to deal with this disease. Enjoy!

Fiery Wife's Sickle Cell Interview at Cleverly Changing

Sunday Brunch- On a Tuesday!

Monday was the day we found out if we were approved to rent the house. If you don't know what I'm talking about, read this, then, read this. The whole day I caught waves of nausea. But God my Rock came through every time the unsettled feeling in my stomach rose up. I prayed, and it would go away. When it came back I prayed again; and again, He would take it away. I learned many things from this experience that I hope encourages you and spurs you on in your current situations.

God my Storm Catcher 
Ned Flanders is not the poster boy for true Christian living! If anything, being a follower of Christ opens you up to more strife and persecution than if you weren't one. Paul is a great example of this. Saul (Paul before he was transformed) was a Pharisee. He was a Roman Citizen and lived a fairly cushy life. Being a Pharisee, he wasn't the richest of rich like the Saducees, but definitely wasn't scrounging around for his food. After Jesus' death, resurrection, and ascension into heaven, Paul suffered many hardships. 2 Corinthians 11:16-33 attests to his suffering. After he accepted Jesus as the true Messiah, he was beaten, whipped, stoned, imprisoned and shipwrecked multiple times. But still he endured for Christ's sake and the furthering of the gospel message. My storm (more like a cloudy day compared to Paul's issues) came and now it's over. The relief I feel is tremendous, but we need the storms to grow our perseverance, trust, and faith in God my Storm Catcher. I feel stronger and wiser for the trial.

God My Shield and Stability 
My instinct as a human is to try to figure things out on my own. I'm getting better at this and relying on God more but God doesn't want me to rely on Him 75%, or 99.99%. He wants me and you to rely upon him 100% of the time with 100% of our issues be they good, bad, or somewhere in the middle. So during this trial (the whole house situation) I got the idea that I needed God's help in figuring out what our house situation was going to be. What I didn't get is that when you're hiding behind God, you can't be flailing about making a whole bunch of noise! I was hiding behind God like my youngest son hides when he's playing hide and seek- not very well! One time, youngest hid underneath the couch cushions; legs hanging out giggling. That was me in this most recent storm. Well, minus the giggling. I think I did more crying than anything. I'm almost certain God was lovingly laughing at me while I did this.
The reason we should hide behind God is because He's the only one that can wholly shield us from the arrows of the the evil one (Psalm 91:1-4). So finally after a couple of well place txt messages from two different friends that sent me Psalm 46:10- "Be still and know that I am God" and a word another friend had for me (God and nothing else is my stability.) I finally realized that I had to stop freaking out. The ugly cry doesn't look good on me and I was getting in the way of God my Shield and Stability, working in my life.

God My Only Truth 
In our waiting to hear back from the realtor, our neighbor pulled us aside after hearing we were desperately trying to contact our land lady. He shared with us that she said she wanted to move back into the house. He knew of no "owner occupy" clause in mortgages and in his opinion, we had really taken care of the place and she liked the improvements we made so much (which was some landscaping changes, strategically placed furniture, and 5 gallons of paint) that she wanted to live there again. He's also a little older and loves to tell stories. I don't think he was lying. I think he, in his haste to be a good neighbor; to help us out, took a conversation he had with her out of context or embellished the truth. But I was in such a vulnerable space that I was tempted to believe his words as absolute truth. I was tempted to be angry at my landlady. I was tempted to be filled with hate and contempt for everything that was going on and not only harbor ill will and feeling for my land lady but also be nasty toward my family. That's how the enemy works. Rumors and idle talk are dangerous because it can spread and fester like a horrible cancer and cause bad feelings where none are needed. Husband pointed out that he was nice but elderly and to take his words with a grain of salt. God reminded me, through my husband,to stay focused on Him because He is the Truth (John 14:6). So after another cry (I've been a total mess) I wiped my eyes and set my gaze upon God my Only Truth.

God My Answer
I like to learn from past experiences. I try not to make the same mistake twice. In the past, I've prayed for things fervently hoping upon hope that God would grant me my heart's desire. Sometimes He did answer my prayer in the way I asked and I was elated. And sometimes he didn't answer my prayer at all or the outcome of the situation was not what I expected. Often when the latter occurred, I was sour. What I prayed for was good. Why wouldn't He give me my desires? God is not a genie in a bottle; He's not an ATM. He's not any of the things our sinful nature has reduced Him to. He's God. He's sovereign. He's just and He right. All the time. He often doesn't answer my prayer in the way I desire because what he has for me is far greater than I can imagine!
So this time, my prayer was simple- "I want what You want (Mark 14:36, Luke 22:42). If it's Your will that we be approved for this new house, then amen! If we don't get approved, then amen. That means what You have for us is better! Either way, I will praise You because no matter the outcome, You answered my prayer."
You're wondering if we were approved. We were not. Amen! Hallelujah! Praise Be to God! You answered my prayer! God my Answer showed up and shut the door! Woo hoo!!!!!!!!   

God My Shelter
Immediately after the realtor called. A sense of calm and peace came over me. But we still hadn't heard from our land lady. Well, today after an evening of teaching kids how to play the piano, I roll up in the driveway and there is Land Lady sitting, talking with my husband on the front porch. She informs us she doesn't have a phone at the moment. She cancelled her phone plan in preparation to travel long term to Sierra Leone; where she is originally from. But in the wake of the Ebola outbreak, she cannot fly out of the States to her homeland. We knew she was making these preparations. She's been talking about traveling for a year now. She has been stressed about the whole house situation and doesn't want us to leave. It seems, Nosy, our next door neighbor may have had it wrong (I still reserve the right to change that statement if anything happens in the near future). I write her the rent check. I now know what's going on. So for right now, we will literally be still. I will stop looking for houses and continue to dwell in the place that I presently call home. God my Shelter (Psalm 91) remained constant and in tact when I didn't know where our earthly shelter was going to be.

I will continue to pray and seek His goodness no matter what the situation. God showed me His many names through this trial I went through (most of which was an internal trial).

Sunday Brunch happens every Sunday as a spiritual encouragement for readers of the Fiery Wife blog. Come back next week and see what God is serving up for you to eat. "Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! (Ps. 34:8)"

Be Still and Know that I am God Fiery Wife!

A few years back, I prayed a prayer to have radical faith. When I prayed that prayer, openly, in front of Husband, he said he shuddered. He said I prayed a scary prayer. As I've been processing this mini drama that has ensued with him this week, he reminded me of that prayer I prayed.

This week I've been a nervous wreck! It's not godly. I'm ashamed to say this whole possible moving thing has really rocked my little world. I have been looking for homes online, driving in neighborhoods prowling for "for rent" signs planted on pretty lawns I can imagine seeing our family in. I've had insomnia. My average knock out time this week has been 3am. I wake up by 7:30 to get Eldest ready for school. I've been a Nervous Nelly. My level of anxiety has actually surprised me!

While I was making a random search in the early evening one night last week, I stumbled (through a series of links I was not able to retrace) across this cute little home in a suburb north of the city I live in that sang to me from the screen. 3 bedrooms- I need that! 2 baths- I need that! Good neighborhood- I don't need that but Forever Mom thinks she does so, it's a plus. Pets OK- Uh-Oh will be happy that this listing doesn't threaten her residency with us. Under $1000/mo- No way! I called and left a message. Then I started the waiting game.......

Tick tock tick tock.........the weekend. Tick tock tick tock........Monday. Tick tock tick tock........Tuesday. Dang it! I missed her call! Crap. Lemme leave a message. "Hey this is Fiery Wife. I like that house you're renting. I wanna see it! Call me back." Tick tock tick tock.....Wednesday. Tick tock tick tock......Thursday morning. "Hey this is Fiery Wife again. Please give me a call back. I wanna take a look at the property. You don't know this, but I've already trolled the neighborhood, and talked to the neighbors and they seem pretty cool. I wanna tell 'em about Jesus after we get friendly. And I really wanna find some place to live before it gets cold. Oh yeah and did I mention our current landlady has gone ghost and I haven't had any contact with her for nearly 3 weeks? Did I also mention I won't be depositing any rent in her bank account until I do hear something from her? I need this house! I need it! I'm scared! I also noticed that the property has a basement. I don't care if it's finished or not. All you need is a rug and some toys to make a play room anyway. Please give me a call back so I can schedule an appointment. Have a great rest of the day and hope to hear from you soon! Byeee." I hope she couldn't hear all that behind my cheery message. Tick tock tick tock.......Friday. "Hey again. It's me. You probably already know my voice.... you know what I want and I've called three separate times. I thought you wanted to rent the place?!? Please give me a ring at your earliest convenience. Have a wonderful day." Well, those were the messages I left in my head. My actual messages were more boring and polite. 

After all that really good stalking (encouraged by a fellow fiery wife), I missed her call. She left a message and said there would be an agent showing the property at 1pm. I know what that means- Competition. Crap! My stomach was in knots. I could feel my chest tightening up. Twice this week, two different people have sent me the "be still and know that I am God" scripture. I've been trying to varying degrees of success. After I found this listing, I stopped looking for other houses and just asked God to make it clear if this was the home for us. He made me wait until Friday so He could reinforce His message in my heart- "be still and know that I am God". I'm being refined by fire. The crucible. I hate the crucible but love how I come out- more focused on God. 

photo credit- http://www.keepcalm-o-matic.co.uk/

I saw the house. It was a nice little house. It had weird wallpaper in the bathrooms but, overall, it wasn't bad. The basement was unfinished but it actually was in decent shape. Nothing a few curtains, area rug and cool furniture couldn't remedy. I put my application and deposit down with 3 other people. That anxiety crept back up on me. I gotta keep my eyes on God. He's got this. 

God does this to us often. He makes situations so that Husband nor I can take any credit for what just happened. Time and time again, He's more clever than us.He's more on-time than we could ever be; and he knows exactly what we need and how we need it. "Be still and know that I am God Fiery Wife." 

I cried in front of my husband. He encouraged me to give my fears and anxieties to God. One of my bestest of friends called me from Chicago. She had been praying for me; talking to God about me today. She asked God to give me stability by means of a residence. God told her "I am her stability."  I'm grateful she was obedient and shared those words with me. I needed to hear that. They were right on time. I cried some more. 

God is my Rock. I can hide behind Him. He can weather storms that would leave me bloodied and mangled by life's shore. When you hide behind something, typically you hunker down and get real close to them. It's like I've been behind God, running in circles, flailing my arms, and yelling really loud. Can you say counterproductive? God's like "Be still and know that I am God. I am your stability. Not this potential house. Not the one you're in or the apartment you were in before. Stop flailing about, hunker down, and get close to me. I got you! I am home." 

Ok God. I'm going to praise you in advance. I praise you if we get this house because it will totally be you and only you who allowed it to happen. I praise you if we don't get this house because my security doesn't dwell within those four walls; it dwells in You! And if you said no to this, that means you got something way better for me and my family. I got some more waiting to do. Monday we're supposed to have an answer. Readers, I'll let you know how it goes. 

Is There Anyone Else Out There Sick and Tired of the ALS Ice Water Challenges?!?

Ok. I'm tired. I'm tired of seeing people dump ice water on their heads. I'm tired of seeing girls clothesline themselves after running away from the water. I'm tired of seeing old lady boobs after they wash away their tube tops with a huge bucket of ice water. I'm tired of celebrity challenges, groups of giddy cheerleaders and droves of regular people blindly dumping water on themselves. Stop it already! You've given the ALS Association 4 years worth of donations in one summer. The campaign was a success! Congratulations!

The issue is not donating to the ALS Association, it's the fact that people are doing it because it's trendy; because it gives them a reason to pour water on themselves. I wonder how many people just dumped some water on their head and didn't donate a dime. If you did the challenge but didn't donate, that's kinda douchy. The idea behind the challenge isn't bad. Donating to a good organization isn't bad. But this right here? This right here? This ice bucket challenge right here, has become something on another level.

Misguided Donation Dollars
Your donating dollars are precious and you should treat every dollar as if it were still backed by gold! If you did the challenge and donated, no, you didn't make a mistake. Who can fault you for donating to a good cause? I'm not going to. But I'm going to challenge you, the next time you do decide to donate, to educate yourself and send your dollars to an organization that
1. you have an interest in
2. impacts you or your family in some type of way
3. is well established and reputable
4. allocates your funds in a way that sits well with you and your pocketbook
I dare say, many of ya'll that did the challenge, didn't think past a bucket of ice water, your camera phone, and your ice bucket hit list.

Sustainability of Your Donation
If asked, everyone cares about starving children. Everyone cares about cancer. Everyone cares about endangered species. Everyone cares about the environment. The vast majority of us have a compassionate heart. There are many organizations out there who want the compassionate money that your compassionate heart compels. The battle over many global and social issues is ongoing. Here's a novel idea: again, think about something that has moved or impacted you- be it a disease, or a social cause and do more than just post witty memes on you Facebook page. Put your money where your mouth is and budget a portion of your yearly salary (even if it's less than 1%) and PARTNER with an organization!

Here's a for instance:
My 4 year old youngest son was diagnosed with Sickle Cell (SC) Disease at birth. That's a disease that just by my son's diagnosis has impacted my ENTIRE family. Sickle Cell Disease is a rarer genetic disease (similar in it's rarity to ALS) that affects the shape of a person's red blood cells. September is Sickle Cell Awareness Month. I feel compelled to share about it, particularly this month because it is a disease that hits close to home so I'm already emotionally invested in eradicating and kicking Sickle Cell's ass if at all possible. If I'm looking into donating my money to a foundation, this would be a good starting place. I should probably get my booty on the internet and research the various organizations related to the disease and choose which one is the most reputable and best fit for my budget and has the best intentions for my hard-earned dollars. I haven't done this yet but I've just totally convicted myself to do so. Real time. Gosh! I hate when that happens.

Photo: Jag_cz Getty Images/iStockphoto)

Don't judge those who don't participate.
I've seen some interesting posts by people who didn't participate in the ice bucket challenge. They were all very apologetic in nature and gave me the feeling like these bloggers felt that if they didn't explain why they're not doing it and what they are doing in the way of philanthropic endeavors; that the Ice Bucket Gestapo would gather them up and give them 20 lashes with a cat-o-nine tails dipped in ice water. Everyone has their reasons! Here's another for instance: My 4 year old....... he would probably never ever participate in such a challenge because extremely cold water and people with a Sickle Cell diagnosis don't mix. The sudden shift in temperature could onset a pain crisis that could put them in the hospital. Just sayin'........

In short, think before you act. Even if it's a good cause. Make your dollars count. And finally, don't be all judgy and stuff. You definitely look better drenched in ice water than cloaked in judgement!

If you'd like to learn more about Sickle Cell Disease, check out this link! Or this one. Or this one too.


Check this link out to see what the ALS Association says about its giving practices.

Sunday Brunch- Eyes to See and Ears to Hear

Victoria Osteen, at the least, stuck her foot in her mouth big time with her most recent and public statements from the pulpit. Victoria is the co-pastor of Lakewood Church in Houston, Texas with her husband Joel Osteen.  Lakewood Chruch is a mega church touting a weekly attendance of more than 40,000 worshippers. Worshippers of what? I don't know.

The issue started with a video clip that was released of Victoria speaking to the congregation from the pulpit with Joel at her side saying the following:

“I just want to encourage everyone of us to realize when we obey God, we’re not doing it for God – I mean, that’s one way to look at it – we’re doing it for ourselves, because God takes pleasure when we’re happy.

“So I want you to know this morning: Just do good for your own self. Do good because God wants you to be happy. When you come to church, when you worship Him, you’re not doing it for God really. You’re doing it for yourself, because that’s what makes God happy. Amen?”

Don't believe me? See for yourself right here.  Disclaimer: I could not find the full length video that included this clip and am aware that statements can be misconstrued and manipulated when edited. I want to be as objective and Bible-based in my reporting on this topic as possible.


A little background..........
I have done my research and know that neither Joel or his wife Victoria are ordained by any reputable, Bible based, Christ-centered, Christian denomination in the world. Joel was "ordained" by his 6 member board at Lakewood in a private ceremony in 1992. Lakewood holds no national or international accreditation and is denominationally undefined. That's like me giving myself the "Best Blogger in the Universe Award" then asking everyone to recognize it's validity.

Lakewood is commonly know amongst Christian evangelical circles as a church that preachers Word of Faith or Prosperity Gospel- a type of teaching that abuses the Word of God by preaching messages that bolster and encourage the accumulation of material things and monetary wealth as a sign of good standing with God.

Back to Victoria..........
The words that came out of her mouth were in direct opposition to the Word of God:

God doesn't promise us happiness- he promises us joy and peace. 
(James 1:2-3, Phillippians 4:7)
The Word talks about joy and peace for followers of Christ but not happiness. Now, to be fair, happiness is mentioned in the Bible, but far less than "joy" and "peace". And, in a quick contextual search of the word "happy" in the Bible, it is used almost exclusively as an emotion of  circumstance. Happy is used to describe a fleeting emotion of God's people in varied circumstances that brought them temporary elevated emotions.

But joy and peace, often incorrectly interchanged with happy, on the other hand, is God breathed and permanent. It surpasses all understanding and prevails in the midst of trial, tribulation, persecution, and pain.

God is a Comforter but is not concerned with our comfort or happiness.
(2 Corinthians 1:4, The entire book of Job)
Job suffered greatly at the hands of the evil one. Job's suffering grieved God but He did not intervene, only telling the enemy he could not kill Job. Job, I would safely say, was unhappy and uncomfortable. The poor man was picking at the sores on his body and had lost everything. To God be the glory! The beauty of Job's testimony is that God restored Job in a way that Job couldn't have imagined. Job was proven to be a righteous man before the Lord; unfaltering in the midst of his pain and suffering. Easily he could've cursed God and died as advised by his wife, but Job chose to be faithful in the midst of a mighty storm.

God wants His glory, is jealous for it, and will share it with no one; not even ourselves!
(Nahum 1:2, Deuteronomy 4:24)
Every word, every story and prophecy point us to the glory of our Triune God- the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. The Word actually warns agains messing with God's glory or giving it to something or someone else.

When we come to church or gather in His Name, we do so for HIM. We DO NOT come for ourselves, we come to worship and glorify God. 
(Colossians 3:16, 1 Peter 2:9)

Gathering for God is the tenant that sets us apart from Humanists and New Age Spiritualists. Our focus is not on self. The Bible tells us that gathering together for God takes the focus off of us humans and puts it on God, where our attention is properly placed.

Victoria Osteen's Words are Dangerous.
They are dangerous because she is in a position of power. They are dangerous because she has a following of millions. They are dangerous because her teachings from the pulpit are in direct opposition to the Word of God. They are dangerous because a new believer or a believer weaker in their faith could misconstrue her words for Gospel truth, which it is not! (Romans 16:17-18, Colossians 2:8, 2 Timothy 4:3-4)

What to do! What to do! Lawd! What to do! 
You have eyes to see and ears to hear (Isaiah 6:10). So please listen carefully to the words coming out of your pastor's mouth! If you've found yourself gravitating to the feel good messages brought forth by the Osteen Ministry, I urge you to be discerning about the leaders you follow. Not all that glitters is gold. A flashy smile, self-promoting witty sayings, and a multitude of other followers will only take you so far in your walk with Christ. One day you will have to stop drinking the nutrient-less milk the Osteens are peddling to the masses and eat some spiritual meat.

Second, earnestly pray for Victoria, her husband Joel, the Lakewood staff, and congregation. Pray that she and her husband Joel have a true encounter with Jesus Christ. Revenue focused Ministries like Joel and Victoria Osteen's take the focus off Christ and unrighteously redirects it to themselves, their material possessions, and the material possessions of their congregants. Often, congregants of these types of churches are relieved of a lot of their money by buying things like New York Times Bestsellers written by their Pastor, that won't get them nearer or gain them entrance into the Kingdom of God! It's not a sin to be rich, but it becomes a lot trickier to be righteous before the Lord when you are (Mark 10:25, 1 Timothy 6:17-19, 1 Timothy 6:9-12).

"I appeal to you, brothers, to watch out for those who cause divisions and create obstacles contrary to the doctrine that you have been taught; avoid them. For such persons do not serve our Lord Christ, but their own appetites, and by smooth talk and flattery they deceive the hearts of the naive."

-Romans 16:17-18

Sunday Brunch happens every Sunday as a spiritual encouragement for readers of the Fiery Wife blog. Come back next week and see what God is serving up for you to eat. "Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! (Ps. 34:8)"



Websites Referenced:
http://www.who2.com/bio/joel-osteen
http://gnli.christianpost.com/video/victoria-osteen-do-good-for-your-own-self-not-for-god-33544
http://www.christianpost.com/news/victoria-osteen-ripped-for-telling-church-just-do-good-for-your-own-self-worship-is-not-for-god-youre-doing-it-for-yourself-125636/
http://www.wnd.com/2014/08/joel-osteens-wife-accused-of-blasphemous-remarks/
http://www.whatchristianswanttoknow.com/does-the-bible-promise-happiness/
https://www.biblegateway.com/quicksearch/?quicksearch=happy&qs_version=ESV
http://carm.org/new-age-what

Why T-25 Takes More than 25 Minutes

If you haven't heard, T-25 (which to me, sounds like a Terminator sequel) is all the newest at home workout craze. I thought to myself........"Hmmmm. I need to lose some weight. This might be good. It only takes 25 minutes. I can do this." So I obtained a copy of the program (by means which I will not speak of because this is definitely NOT a paid review of this product). I popped it into my DVD player PUMPED because I knew within a few short weeks, all my weight woes will be over! I would finally lose this 7 year old baby weight. I could once again strut my stuff without fear of my muffin top spilling over to my knees. I would be able to see my girlfriend with a quick glance down once again.

This will be awesome! I can take out all the clothes in my "hope chest" and wear them again.  You probably have a "hope chest" and don't even know it! You know, that set of clothes you have nestled in the back of your closet that one day you have the hope of fitting into once again because you know if you donate them or burn them in your bath tub that you will be admitting weight defeat. You will have lost the "battle of the bulge" and "war on cottage cheesy cellulite" and the "fight for fit" and a thousand other different weight loss campaigns you've embarked upon! Well, that's why the clothes sit in the back of my closet at least.

Anyway.......T-25 was going to solve all of these problems and give me whiter teeth and clearer skin. I popped the DVD in with great anticipation. I completed the 25 worst minutes of my life! It really wasn't that bad I'm just out of shape. I sweat like a lady in white on her period. Shaun T, is a fine instructor. Sometimes his semi-lisp can get annoying but he was direct and to the point. But it was Tania "The Machine" Baron that taunted me the whole time. In Shaun T's workout series Insanity, Tania was cut up! She had a 6 pack and a whole bunch of other muscles I could only dream of having and she did each and every exercise to the MAX! In T-25, after having a kid (or two or six, I don't know), Shaun put her in charge of the "modified" exercises, I'm assuming as an encouragement for all the mommies out there but she didn't break a sweat the whole time. Her contented face taunted me as I had to stare at her for my "modified" instructions, never saying a word but saying everything with her not-so-quite-cut-up-but-still-ridiculously-in-shape-after-birth body!

T-25 took more than 25 minutes. After the workout, I lay on my living room floor unable to move for about 15 minutes. My husband thought it funny if he took a picture of me which I have shared for you enjoyment. Then I had to get up from the floor. That took about another 5 minutes. Then I had to move my rickety joints around the living room for another 5 minutes to loosen them up just so I could make it to my bathroom to wash the sweat and discouragement off my body. The shower took another 25 minutes (I call it S-25 because I moved so slowly in there). After my shower, I looked in the mirror and stared (another 5 minutes). Just stared......Then I dried myself off (2 minutes) and went back to the mirror to stare again for another 5 minutes. While staring, I began to after-shower-sweat. Which sucks because it almost makes you feel like taking another shower. But I fought the urge and moved on to making my way to the bed (2.5 minutes). Now imagine if you worked a 9-5 and had to get ready for work! Ahhhhhh! T-25 took me 89.5 minutes!!!!!! What?!? Yeah.

If you have any workout disasters, let me know them in the comments below. I want to laugh and cry with someone else about this.

Sunday Brunch- When You're at Your Wit's End.....

Don't give up. Get up! Keep running the race. 

Remember that post I wrote about critters in the attic (check it out here)? Well, they're back. This time there's squirrels in the attic! On top of that, our landlady came with some wonderfully disturbing news last Sunday. I am at my wit's end! This rental house has been a challenge to say the least. So this Sunday brunch is for me!

Don't Give Up

The Problem:
Our landlady came by last Sunday and told us that through a series of unforeseen events, she found out that her mortgage agreement has a "no renters" clause; meaning she is to be the sole occupant of the residence for the duration of the loan. She found this out because, through a correspondence she had with the bank about property taxes, she wrote her current address on the paperwork instead of our address. The bank then sent her a nice little letter saying she had essentially defaulted on her loan because she breeched the owner occupancy agreement and she had 30 days (mind you this was 15 days in to the 30 days) to occupy the residence, refinance, or be foreclosed upon. On top of that, the critters have come back this time in the form of squirrels!

My Feelings: 
This is my worst nightmare! All I want to do is stay in one place long enough to become familiar with it; to really get to know my neighbors......... I don't want to move again. I don't want to deal with critters again! I feel defeated.

What the Word Says: 
Isaiah 41:10
"Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

My Response to the Word:
Ok God. I need your help with being ok with not knowing what's going to happen... I know you have my back even though I am discouraged.

Get Up

The Problem:
But I don't wanna deal with this!

My Feelings:
I want to crawl under a rock somewhere and not be seen or heard from until all the squirrels and raccoons shrivel up and die very far away from where I live! I want to be transported to a home that doesn't have holes in the ceiling, where all the outlets work, where I don't have to fight busted food disposals and leaky toilets where all of my family's belongings are unpacked and set up just how I like it. I don't want to have to find a new place for everything and familiarize myself with another residence!

What the Word Says:
John 5:1-9
1 After this there was a feast of the Jews, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem. 2 Now there is in Jerusalem by the Sheep Gate a pool, in Aramaic called Bethesda, which has five roofed colonnades. 3 In these lay a multitude of invalids—blind, lame, and paralyzed. 5 One man was there who had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. 6 When Jesus saw him lying there and knew that he had already been there a long time, he said to him, “Do you want to be healed?” 7 The sick man answered him, “Sir, I have no one to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, and while I am going another steps down before me.” 8 Jesus said to him, “Get up, take up your bed, and walk.” 9 And at once the man was healed, and he took up his bed and walked.

My Response to the Word:
I am no better than the invalids- the paralytics, sightless, and lames who were hanging around the Bethesdan pool. But Jesus said to the paralytic "get up"! There was action that needed to be taken by the paralytic. Jesus could've healed him all day long but the paralytic wouldn't have know the healing took place unless he stood up to walk. I've been sitting, thinking about these critters for a couple of weeks now; paralyzed by the reality that I'll have to stalk my land lady again. Weeks! Who does that? Me. I don't want to feel this way but sometimes it's really hard (sometimes it seems dang near impossible) to get up; to start the stalker-ish calls to my landlady; to work my world around these critters schedule exterminators and everything else that accompanies these animals! But as long as I stay down, I won't be able to see the miracles that God is working in my family's life! Like maybe this snafu with the address and the threatened foreclosure is a blessing in disguise. Sometimes we stay paralyzed not because of Jesus' lack of healing; but because of our own lack of movement. Hmmm.

Keep Running the Race

The Problem:
I'm weary.

My Feelings:
I'm sick and tired of moving and having squatters living in the attic. They're not paying rent! We already have enough people and animals living in this house! I just want to be still. No more movement! No more packing and unpacking! I feel like snapping off on my landlady for not READING her agreement and putting us in this predicament.

What the Word Says: 
Hebrews 12:-2
Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.…

My Response to the Word:
If Jesus carried a cross and died on that cross to atone for my sins, I need to shut up and keep it moving. There were many that came before me that fell harder and sinned worse; but they got up and finished the race. They didn't lay down and wither away, they ran harder! I am encouraged that my problems will not halt the rotation of the earth. My life is His so I must run toward Him;  my eyes fixed on His glory no matter what path he leads me down. It's not for me to question Him or try to figure this one out,(which I'm prone to do) but to simply be obedient. In my flesh, that sucks! But I know it's for the edification of my Spirit.

This one was tough. I have a lot to think and pray about.

Sunday Brunch happens every Sunday as a spiritual encouragement for readers of the Fiery Wife blog. Come back next week and see what God is serving up for you to eat. "Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! (Ps. 34:8)"

What happens in Vegas.........Never Stays in Vegas!!!!!!!! Pt. 1

Some of my family got together and went on a Vegas vacation this past week. Husband and I are trying to stack our money, not blow it so we opted out. Forever Mom, older sister and youngest sister all went. Forever Mom and Older Sister flew out of our city and Youngest Sister flew out from Chicago, where she still lives.

Now...... Forever Mom is overweight and has joint problems because of her weight. Husband, Youngest Sister and I all told her that this might not be the best vacation for her because all you do in Vegas is walk. I guess my mother "didn't think fat meat was greasy" (Forever Mom LOVES that saying) and went anyway. Did I also mention that Forever Mom is also deathly afraid of flying AND is claustrophobic? Oh this definitely made for a great vacation.

The day of departure comes. I drop Forever Mom and Oldest Sister off at the airport and off they go into the sky. From Chicago, Youngest Sister is updating Facebook real time. Misspelling words all over the place and finally, she admits she's been drinking since 7am preparing to be drunk for her flight because she too, is deathly afraid of flying. Self medicating at its best. Oh Lawd! But everyone gets to Vegas safe and sound. Thank God!

According to Youngest Sister, Forever Mom comes out the plane complaining every excruciating pre-arthritic, obese step of the way. "It's hot. I can't walk. I can't breathe. I ain't trying to spend a whole bunch of money. Where's the buffet? The buffet's how much?!? Can't we do something in my hotel? Across the street? I can't walk that far. Once I get across the street I'm gonna have to walk another 30 minutes through the casino! I'm gonna take a taxi. Why won't they drop me off on the corner? They only will take me to a hotel? That doesn't make sense! I'm hot. I'm just gonna stay in the hotel room." Mom is stressing Youngest Sister.

I call Forever Mom and ask her how it's going. "Oh! We're having a wonderful time! The food is great. There is a good amount of walking but I'm holding up." I just laugh a little on the inside. That's mom. I check in with Youngest Sister and again she as a story. This time about Oldest Sister. Oldest Sister is also overweight. The overweight things is something that has plagued the women in our family for generations. We are beautiful women but at some point in time (usually after childbirth) we all gain weight. Some lose it, some fall somewhere in the middle of skinny and not so skinny (that's me) and some just go full throttle obese. But I digress. Oldest Sister wants to go to Victoria's Secret. But there's a problem. It's across the street too.

Youngest and Cousin from Cali (who also came with her mom, Forever Mom's sister, husband, and son) warned Oldest Sister it was a decent walk. Oldest says she can swing it. 5 minutes from the promised land of lacy underwear, padded bras, and seductively named fragrances, Oldest Sister gives up. "I can't f&%^$n' do this! It's too f#@&*n' far! What the f#@k! I need a mother f*#$%n' taxi cab" Youngest attempts to calm her down but there is no subduing the angry exhaustion beast that has emerged from the depths of my sister's raging and aching feet. Cousin from Cali is obviously uncomfortable with this outburst; not knowing that this is my oldest sister's baseline in life. Youngest sister tells Oldest Sister that the taxi cab hub is farther away than the secrets Victoria holds and sarcastically gives her turn by turn directions to the taxi hub. There's some more cursing and yelling and Oldest Sister is off. Sweet Cousin from Cali asks "You're going to make up before dinner right?" to which Youngest Sister answers "F*^% her!" Oh mi familia!

Everyone who went reported there were good times interspersed with the angry banter that knows my family all too well and sooner than not, their time in Vegas came to an end. No new millionaires. Forever Mom didn't even gamble. Every one checked out of their respective hotels with lighter pockets and fuller bellies.

But there were still the plane rides home.....

To Husband

Husband,

I love you! I love you! I love you! I cannot count the ways nor will a Shakespearean soliloquy of any sort, render the depth of my affection any justice. You are just what I needed. There is no one on this earth that could sufficiently measure up to the husband you've been to me. I am so glad that you have always encouraged me in my dreams and aspirations, spurring me to think bigger, dream wilder, and chase whatever God gave me license to chase.

You're better than a partner in crime; you're my partner in Christ. I so appreciate that you were the one to lead me to Jesus. I denied your request to come to church for 6 months of Sundays straight but you were persistent. God had a plan for me that overshadowed every single plan I fashioned for myself. I had to say yes to Jesus before I could say yes to you. It took me a moment to understand God's ordering was far better than mine but I wised up so Praise God! What goodness awaited me out of your Godly persistence to keep inviting. You were my agent of change! You are the Aaron to my Moses, holding my arms up when I want to give up. You are the Abraham to my Sarah, guiding me, having faith (sometimes for me) that God will do what He says He will do and not a minute too soon!

For the past eight years, we've laughed and cried together and CHOSEN to love each other deeply; even when it was not convenient to do so. We've ushered the presence of 2 amazing boys into this world and for you and the boys, it was well worth the weight, and the stretch marks :) I loved you before I had words to qualify what I felt. We were truly kids when we first became friends and I love that! I love that you were my friend before my lover. You are an exceptional man and amazing father. Forget what Maya Angelou, rest her soul, said about the phenomenal woman.  Phenomenal Husband, that's you!

Sunday Brunch- A Response to a Police Officer's Wife's reaction to the Ferguson Missouri Incident

Kristi Neace is a "Christian author. International/National speaker. Women's Speaker. Police Wife. Books. Bible Studies. Bible teacher." She recently wrote a blog post about all the tragic happenings in Ferguson, Missouri. I can't say I was surprised at the post she wrote but I was surprised about my initial reaction. I felt frustrated, confused at some of the Biblical connections she made and generally wondered how on earth so many like minded, Bible reading, followers of Christ could truly assume the same point of view in the comment section of her blog. I'll summarize her post but if you'd like to read it in it's entirety here it is. If you chose the link you can skip the next couple of paragraphs and read my response.

Kristi is frustrated at all she's been hearing. Her husband is a cop and she wanted to offer a counter perspective to this incident (I like counter perspectives;)) Recently she's heard a lot of cop bashing banter. She wants us to put ourselves in the officers shoes that work long hours protecting people who desire to sometimes abuse the very officers that want to serve and protect. She continued to number the many cops that have lost their lives in the line of duty (may God bless their service and their families). She then goes on to accuse the media of cop bashing. Kristi goes on to talk about the spouses of the cops and all they endure. She finally gets to the spiritual aspect of the writing where she addresses sin.

"There is no such thing as a black or white issue, 

male or female issue, rich or poor issue, what it 

reveals is the condition of the heart."

Kristi continues to talk about how she will encourage officers. She thanks those that respect them, asks God to help those that lash out at officers over media outlets. Admonishes the politicians who decide to weigh in on situations like these, and encourages the media to find some integrity. 

This is my letter to Kristi: 

Kristi,

As the wife of a fireman, who also puts his life on the line every day he's on duty, thank you for your husband's service and your's as well as a wife. The ultimate tragedy in the Ferguson case was that a young man's life was lost. I cannot argue "facts" as I do not know the "facts".  None of us really can know, as we live in a media age where "newsworthy" (i.e. ratings booster) stories are spun like a child's top.

What I can say is, historically there has been in this country, a system that has unfairly treated minority communities and its residents as "less than". My black fire fighting husband has been treated on numerous occasions as "less than" by law enforcement officers. I, a person of mixed race, with all my professional accolades and college degree has been treated as "less than" by law enforcement officers. This very well documented improper treatment of minorities is a shameful blemish on this country's Constitution and laws which purport to defend the rights of every human being who dwells in the U.S. via the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and many other legal statutes that exists to protect us from this type of behavior.

As a fellow believer, it is our duty as followers of Christ, not only to pray, fast, and lament for injustices (be they perceived by us as embellishments or actual, right in our own backyards or in a distant suburb like Ferguson, Missouri) but to take action when necessary (Micah 6:8). There are thousands of American believers, men women and children, who sacrificed things like their dignity, personal safety, and sometimes their precious lives so that each and every once of us (regardless of color) could be ensured a more concrete explanation of our God given rights and have those rights enforced to the fullest extent of the law. They too have been "spit on, flipped off, cursed out, beaten, shot at, run over and belittled" all in the name of justice. Kristi, the problem is not your husband, but the established and flawed governing system that came before he ever pinned an officer's badge on the lapel of his uniform.

Regarding your husband's job, the things you mentioned (long work hours, missed family time, and the abusive behavior of the general public), be they hazardous, are the occupational norms of his job. My husband deals with being pooped, peed, bled, vomited on (exposing him to all kinds of diseases and infections), possibly being asphyxiated due to insufficient air, trapped in a burning building, and potentially being burnt to a crisp. BUT he chose this line of work as his profession. The perils of the job are his occupational norm. Now, this doesn't alleviate the potential stress on my end because of his job but I did have the chance, because we were already married, to speak into and discuss his decision to become a fireman. Ultimately, his career was a choice we both agreed upon.

 Micah 6:8 states "And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God." Where was the justice in Ferguson? Where was mercy for Michael Brown's life? Where was the humility of the law enforcement community in the wake of the residents of Ferguson being stricken, appalled, and deeply wounded  by the preceding events? These are questions I'm asking myself and praying about as I continue to process through this incident; an incident that sadly sounded very familiar to ones I've heard the length of my life as a brown person.

You are right Kristi, it does indeed boil down to sin but sin revels in dwelling and wreaking havoc in places like race, gender, and socio-economic differences; places that God intended for our differences to compliment each other. But sin swept in after the fall of Adam and Eve and continually attempts to usurp God's goodness. Sin is not blind. And neither are we. I pray that justice prevails. I have hope that God will right whatever went so horribly wrong the day that Michael Brown's life was taken away. I pray my Father's will be done and no one else's.

Fiery Wife

Sunday Brunch happens every Sunday as a spiritual encouragement for readers of the Fiery Wife blog. Come back next week and see what God is serving up for you to eat. "Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! (Ps. 34:8)"

   

Sunday Brunch- A Call to Action

I am ashamed. I am ashamed that my prayers have been little and meager. Little in length. Little in commitment, but large in their cowardice. These past few days I have shied away from headlines that have anything to do with the persecution of Christians and other religious minorities at the hands of ISIS in Iraq. I have been too concerned with upsetting myself, to look at the carnage that an entire community of believers is facing.  It's easy for me to do this. They're so far away from me.

But today, I say no. The enemy wants us to do nothing but I want nothing to do with the enemy! So today I stop being a wuss. I will not remain silent. I will not politely refrain from talking about scary things. I refuse to have any more surface-y conversations with fellow believers. It's not time for that!

Followers of Christ, WAKE UP if you've been sleeping! “The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God is at hand; repent and believe in the gospel.” Mark 1:15. Please please repent, stop your foolishness and believe that the Gospel is true and living and you, yes YOU have purpose for the furthering of God's kingdom. Please, do not warm the bench tomorrow at church. The enemy revels in that. God's words and power are transformative. So, step aside; move out of the way so God can transform you in order to use you!

I read an article that shook me to my core. It wasn't any kind of prolific writing; it was the un-pixellated images. Images that have permanently been burned into my memory. The body of a headless toddler. The body-less heads of half a dozen young men on display for all to see. My chest tightened and I broke a sweat in my air conditioned living room. That could've been my youngest or my husband in those photos had I been born in Iraq instead of the U.S. I felt this rock in the hollows of my stomach; not knowing what to do with it all. So I began to write this.

 "Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." (1 Peter 5:8-9) These atrocities are scare tactics for the living! They are intended to devour our faith; make us weak in the knees and cower before the seeming might of the enemy. Please do not be deceived. He has not won. The victory was Christ Jesus' sacrifice and subsequent resurrection. Be alert brothers and sisters. Don't change the channel, don't exit out of that internet window just to look at mindless buffoonery. Allow this technology we possess to carry the messages that will break your heart so that you will be compelled to DO ANYTHING for Christ's sake. We have the luxury to sit in front of our televisions, laptops, IPads, smart phones (even our stupid phones are smart), and watch the carnage of a multitude of innocents being MARTYRED for their faith. What greater the pain of those presently; real time; enduring this persecution all in the name of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.

Brothers and sisters, this is not the time to sit idly and not take action. There are a multitude of things you can do actively to aid those in need. I urge you to choose at least 3 and take action right now!

Pray. Pray and pray some more!

Fast. Ask God what to fast from; He will show you.

Read your Bible; specifically the Gospels so you know why you call yourself Christian.

 I will pray, fast (I hesitated to write the word "fast" because my flesh doesn't want to) and read for my brothers and sisters being martyred in Iraq. I proclaim my intentions for accountability; knowing the weakness of my flesh. Hold me to it. Ask me how it's going. I'll be honest. I know I get cranky when I don't eat so the next few blogs are sure to be interesting.

If you need some encouragement to get moving and the articles and videos popping up in your Facebook newsfeed aren't doing it for you, read the lineage of faithful people that we have derived from:

Hebrews 11
By Faith
Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. 2 For by it the people of old received their commendation. 3 By faith we understand that the universe was created by the word of God, so that what is seen was not made out of things that are visible.

4 By faith Abel offered to God a more acceptable sacrifice than Cain, through which he was commended as righteous, God commending him by accepting his gifts. And through his faith, though he died, he still speaks. 5 By faith Enoch was taken up so that he should not see death, and he was not found, because God had taken him. Now before he was taken he was commended as having pleased God. 6 And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him. 7 By faith Noah, being warned by God concerning events as yet unseen, in reverent fear constructed an ark for the saving of his household. By this he condemned the world and became an heir of the righteousness that comes by faith.

8 By faith Abraham obeyed when he was called to go out to a place that he was to receive as an inheritance. And he went out, not knowing where he was going. 9 By faith he went to live in the land of promise, as in a foreign land, living in tents with Isaac and Jacob, heirs with him of the same promise. 10 For he was looking forward to the city that has foundations, whose designer and builder is God. 11 By faith Sarah herself received power to conceive, even when she was past the age, since she considered him faithful who had promised. 12 Therefore from one man, and him as good as dead, were born descendants as many as the stars of heaven and as many as the innumerable grains of sand by the seashore.

13 These all died in faith, not having received the things promised, but having seen them and greeted them from afar, and having acknowledged that they were strangers and exiles on the earth. 14 For people who speak thus make it clear that they are seeking a homeland. 15 If they had been thinking of that land from which they had gone out, they would have had opportunity to return. 16 But as it is, they desire a better country, that is, a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared for them a city.

17 By faith Abraham, when he was tested, offered up Isaac, and he who had received the promises was in the act of offering up his only son, 18 of whom it was said, “Through Isaac shall your offspring be named.” 19 He considered that God was able even to raise him from the dead, from which, figuratively speaking, he did receive him back. 20 By faith Isaac invoked future blessings on Jacob and Esau. 21 By faith Jacob, when dying, blessed each of the sons of Joseph, bowing in worship over the head of his staff. 22 By faith Joseph, at the end of his life, made mention of the exodus of the Israelites and gave directions concerning his bones.

23 By faith Moses, when he was born, was hidden for three months by his parents, because they saw that the child was beautiful, and they were not afraid of the king's edict. 24 By faith Moses, when he was grown up, refused to be called the son of Pharaoh's daughter, 25 choosing rather to be mistreated with the people of God than to enjoy the fleeting pleasures of sin. 26 He considered the reproach of Christ greater wealth than the treasures of Egypt, for he was looking to the reward. 27 By faith he left Egypt, not being afraid of the anger of the king, for he endured as seeing him who is invisible. 28 By faith he kept the Passover and sprinkled the blood, so that the Destroyer of the firstborn might not touch them.

29 By faith the people crossed the Red Sea as on dry land, but the Egyptians, when they attempted to do the same, were drowned. 30 By faith the walls of Jericho fell down after they had been encircled for seven days. 31 By faith Rahab the prostitute did not perish with those who were disobedient, because she had given a friendly welcome to the spies.

32 And what more shall I say? For time would fail me to tell of Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, of David and Samuel and the prophets— 33 who through faith conquered kingdoms, enforced justice, obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions, 34 quenched the power of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, were made strong out of weakness, became mighty in war, put foreign armies to flight. 35 Women received back their dead by resurrection. Some were tortured, refusing to accept release, so that they might rise again to a better life. 36 Others suffered mocking and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment. 37 They were stoned, they were sawn in two,[a] they were killed with the sword. They went about in skins of sheep and goats, destitute, afflicted, mistreated— 38 of whom the world was not worthy—wandering about in deserts and mountains, and in dens and caves of the earth.

39 And all these, though commended through their faith, did not receive what was promised, 40 since God had provided something better for us, that apart from us they should not be made perfect.

Footnotes:
Hebrews 11:37 Some manuscripts add they were tempted

Let me know if you'll join in and do something. Share this post if you feel it will encourage someone to get off their butt and do something. This is not for my glory but for God's. Peace be with you this week!   

Sunday Brunch happens every Sunday as a spiritual encouragement for readers of the Fiery Wife blog. Come back next week and see what God is serving up for you to eat. "Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! (Ps. 34:8)"

A Quick Rant/Tantrum Before a Doctor's Visit

It's that time again! Time for the bi-annual hematology visit for Youngest Song and I HATE THAT HE HAS TO GO!
I hate that he was diagnosed with this disease!
I hate that he will have to have blood drawn!
I hate that he's afraid of the doctors and nurses!
I hate that those same doctors and nurses will try to tell me my son will only get worse, not better!
I hate that we'll be there for over 3 hours and have to see the doctor, nurse practitioner, geneticist, dental hygienist, and social worker!
I hate those cold and lonely exam rooms!
I hate that they try to unsuccessfully make them warm with butterflies and other woodland creatures!
I hate that although this diagnosis doesn't define my son that this is part of his story!

I love that Husband called off (the first time ever) to be there with Youngest Son and support me!
I love that we have a great support system that reminded me that our family and Youngest's story can be an encouragement to sufferers of this disease because of his phenomenal health!
I love that my son has never suffered more than a needle prick!
I love that God knows me and is gracious with my thoughts and feelings and has encouraged me through his Word (I started a new devotion about the major characters of the Bible and Youngest Son's Biblical namesake was the first character mentioned) that my son will have long life!

Ahhhhhh! Ok. I'm done.

Sunday Brunch- The Pride of Life; a Fresh Perspective

"For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world." 1 John 2:16

If you're a believer, you've probably heard or referenced this very popular Bible verse once or twice in your life. Lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes and the pride of life. The pride of life...... When I think of that phrase, thoughts of yachts and mansions and Ferraris rush my imagination. I think of Ken Jeong in that Adidas commercial, wearing that gold windbreaker suit sitting on a pile of money. But many more of us suffer from the Pride of Life than we'd like to recognize.

The evil one is clever in the manifestations of sin. The enemy will have you think something sinful you're doing isn't sinful at all. Vincent's Word Studies defines the pride of life (from the greek-             ἡ ἀλαζονεία τοῦ βίου) as:

"empty, braggart talk or display; swagger; 

and thence an insolent and vain assurance 

in one's own resources, 

or in the stability of earthly things, 

which issues in a contempt of divine laws."

"Empty, Braggart Talk or Display; Swagger"

Actor Ken Jeong portraying a filthy rich glutton
 in an Adidas Ad campaign. I don't know what it had to do
with shoes.........

the Ken Jeong example is the easiest example of "vainglory" to recognize. We all know at least one person like that. They may not wear a gold windbreaker suit but maybe they're always talking about their newest shopping conquest (the new Michael Kors handbag or the upgrade from the Honda to the Acura). Do you have a DIY-er friend? The DIYers are my favorite. "I bought this mid-century piece of crap at the thrift store for 10 bucks and for only $100 in chalkboard paint, a gallon of strategically applied modge podge, and seven coats of shellack later, I have this fully customized piece of shabby couture!" It seems harmless enough, but it's boastful. 

Here's a more covert one: maybe you have a friend that's always talking about how much they saved coupon-ing. They've possibly shown you their insurmountable stockpile of free deodorant, single-blade razors, and Poise pads (even though they're not old or leaky) they have FOR ABSOLUTELY NO REASON. We truly are obsessed with saving in this country. But what are we saving for? Is it for God's glory or our own bragging rights? 

Here's the most covert of examples- Do you possibly have a friend (because it couldn't be you) that does missional things (i.e. feed the hungry, clothe the naked, shelter the homeless, etc....) and then announces them in a "humble" way over social media? Maybe they even show a picture of the poor soul who they've helped with the scarf THEY put around their neck with some churchy quote that goes something like this "Blessed to have met Sammy while reaching out to the homeless community tonight." Who was that post for?!?!? Sammy surely aint' seeing it! He most likely doesn't have a computer. Matt. 6:3 clearly states: "But when you give to the needy, do not let your right hand know what your left hand is doing," Goodness gracious! Whatever happened to storing up your treasures in heaven? 

(just a side note,with the exception of the Acura, Michael Kors bag and announcing missional acts on social media, I am guilty to varying degrees of the other offenses mentioned)  

"An Insolent and Vain Assurance in One's Own Resources, or in the Stability of Earthly Things,"

For a long time, my email password was "independentwoman". You'll have to forgive me, because I came of age right when that Destiny's Child song was soaring to the top of the Billboard charts and "Girl Power" was a religion more than it was a catch phrase. I thought I could do anything I wanted and say anything that came to mind. My mom told me "You don't need no man for nothing. Get a job before you get kids. Make sure if he leaves you, you can help yourself."And I prescribed to that for most of my teens and early 20's. But I wasn't truly independent. Instead, I was a slave to seeing how much I could do without the help of anyone else; man, woman, family, or friend. I drove myself near insane and also became super lonely in the process. 

When or if you declare yourself independent, the only thing you make yourself, is independent of God. See, God works in our weakness not our strength and independence. If we decide to declare independence, He'll leave us be for a while, to bloody our own nose. Then, He'll come and clean us up; demonstrating how much He loves us, how much we really do need Him, and getting his well-deserved glory (2 Corinthians 12:9-10).  

We were not meant to do this life alone. We are to walk out our faith with one another (fellow followers of Christ); sharing your life (I'm not talking hippie communes)- the joys, struggles, humiliations and triumphs with each other for God's glory and each other's edification. We are to commune with God regularly through the reading of His Word, and prayer. (Hebrews 10: 24-25, Ecclesiastes 4:9-12)  

"A Contempt of Divine Laws"

Our God is a jealous God (Exodus 20:4-5). He doesn't want to share the spotlight; not even with us! 

Prideful behavior, reduced to its most basic element, is placement of focus on ourselves and the removal of our focus from God. So I ask, where is your focus? 

Are you consumed with the perfection of your image?

Do you mourn or pity the things that lack regarding your image (self deprecate)?  

Have you made yourself an idol by constantly being obsessed with your image or what others think about you? 

Have made your blog, your children, or perhaps, your spouse and idol? Do you spend more time thinking about them than spending time with God? 

If you answered yes to any of the questions above, then you're in contempt! Get it? Like contempt of court? With our self-preservation and focus on self, we are pridefully attempting to usurp the divine laws. It's not gonna happen though. We're not gonna win that struggle. We cannot serve 2 masters (Matt. 6:24) so you gotta choose: God or god(s)? 

This Sunday Brunch was a tough one. While writing it, God has put the mirror right in my face and has allowed me to see some places I need to relinquish to Him. Isn't God good like that?!? It's a humbling and refining experience but I love it because I come out better (because of God) and more equipped to do His work. I pray the same for you. 

Sunday Brunch happens every Sunday as a spiritual encouragement for readers of the Fiery Wife blog. Come back next week and see what God is serving up for you to eat. "Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! (Ps. 34:8)"

A Memory- Me, A Van, An Old Lady, a Pitbull, and a Shadow

THIS IS A TRUE STORY. I AM NOT MAKING ANY OF THIS UP.

I had to say that because people I've shared this with previously haven't believed me at first and I've had to convince them this truly happened to me. Allow me to begin.

I was on my way to a prayer service at church. I was running late because I had argued with Husband (about something utterly insignificant) and had to stop at my pastor's house to pick up the building keys. Uggh. Just how I wanted to start a prayer service.

I was at an intersection in the right-hand turn lane. I was waiting for traffic to clear when a car to my left (not in ANY turn lane) decided to take a right turn in front of me and scraped the driver's side of my van (if you're confused, see the diagram next to this paragraph) and kept driving. A hit and run!!!!! By the way, this was a month old new/used van. At this point in time, I had a decision to make- 1. let this jerk go and chalk up any damage that this driver may have caused or 2. chase down this driver and snap the hell off.

I chose #2. This was out of my character. I am typically fun
loving/optimistic/ and even tempered. I am definitely not promoting anyone choose #2. For all I knew this person could've had a gun and killed me on sight. But something happened when that person hit my car. My kids could've been in the van. There was potential for injury and this person hadn't even stopped. I was already aggravated by the fact Husband and I had argued earlier, I was running late, and now someone hit me! I was through.

I continued my turn and sped up to the next red light were the driver who hit me was stopped. I pulled up next to the driver and discovered it was an OLD lady. Did this stop me? No. I began honking my horn. She ignored me at first but then I rolled down my window, yelled at the top of my lungs, and honked at the same time.

"LADY! LADY!"

She finally looked over.....confused. She rolled down her window. Her mistake.

"LADY! YOU HIT MY CAR!!!!!!!" Pause.
"I didn't hit your car."
"YES YOU DID!"
"Oh, my." She clutched her chest. Crap. Did I just give this lady a heart attack? Did I stop? Nope. Chest clutch or not, we were gonna talk.
"PULL OVER!"
"But....but...but...."
"I SAID PULL OVER NOWWWWWW!"

She waved me off and I didn't know wether she was going to pull over or peel off. The light turned green as I gathered myself. I had yelled so hard I felt the pressure leave my head. I'm sure I was a purplish/red color too. I looked to my right to make sure I didn't make a doofus move and hit someone, when I caught the eye of the driver on my opposite side. They looked at me as if I had 3 heads. I guess I was lookin' all sorts of crazy. I didn't care.

The part of town we were in, isn't known for it's safety so all I really wanted to do was check my van, exchange numbers and leave. The old lady pulled into a parking lot in a strip mall and made her way out of the car. She came to me with her hands up, quivering. Still, I'm not caring.

"Please don't yell at me anymore."

"OK. Lady. But you hit my van and drove off! What you did really could've hurt someone. You could've hurt yourself!"

"Ohhhh." She shook some more. This lady didn't even know she had hit me. She was so old. This is why I truly believe at a certain age, some old peoples' licenses should permanently expire! Real talk!

"See look, you scratched my van on the drivers side!"

"I did that?"

"Yes lady, you did!"

"Oh, I am so sorry! What do we do now?" I was starting to feel a little bad for how I treated her.

"Go back to your car, get your insurance card and drivers license and I'll go to my van and get my information and we'll exchange."

"O.K." She shuffled back to her car.

Now this is were it gets just plain old strange. Stay with me.

I walked back over to my van to get my info when I heard yelling in the background.

"Naw naw naw. Dafuq you gon' walk away from me......"

I look over to see a young woman with a pit bull on a chain leash, trailing behind a young man. Her pointer finger in the air, yelling at the top of her lungs at this guy. The young man seemed to not want to deal with her and wasn't saying much and was calmly walking away from her but toward where both the old lady and my cars were parked.

The young man finally says something-

"I can't believe you pulled that knife on me! Damn!"

This can't be! She couldn't have pulled a knife on him! I hear that wrong.

"You damn straight I pulled that mother f@#*%n' knife on you!

Really! Now, I'm from the city but I'm not from the hood so my alertness peaked when I hear the word "knife" and heard the brandishing of one confirmed by the other party. Time to speed up this process. I walk over to the old lady's car. She was busy rifling through her glove compartment trying to find her insurance card.

"Is this my insurance card?" She asked ME this question.
"No ma'am. That's your AARP card. Do you have insurance?"
"Yes baby, I do." While this old lady is trying to find her insurance card, she doesn't realize there is a potential knife fight about to break out behind her. I AM OFFICIALLY IN THE TWILIGHT ZONE!

I look up from the old lady's car to see what's going on with this domestic altercation when out of NOWHERE and I do mean nowhere, a transsexual/transgendered (male by birth) appears. This person was wearing a pink off the shoulder fitted shirt, with a pair of grey capri leggings, flip flops, curly hair to his shoulders and a 5 O'clock shadow (I shall call this person Shadow from this point on). My jaw dropped. Not because Shadow was a transsexual. In Chicago, my husband and I lived very close to Boys Town so we were accustomed to seeing very diverse members of the LGBT community walking the streets; everything from people walking each other on leather leashes to your Abercrombie and Fitch, homogenized gay guy. My jaw dropped because it was more, the fact that this was happening 10 minutes before I was expected to go up on stage, sing, and praise Jesus! Ahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!

Shadow was Young Woman's friend and Shadow came as backup for this fight. Here's how the rest of this fight played out:

Young Woman- "You know what Ima sick my dog on you!"

This caught the young man's attention. He stopped walking.

Shadow- "Das right girl you sick dat dog on him!"

Young Woman dropped the chain and patted the dog on the butt. Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the old woman was STILL trying to find her insurance card.

"Is this my insurance card?"

"No ma'am that's a rewards card."

I was now really scared for this young man's life. Thank God the dog sat down on the pavement instead of viciously ripping off this man's face. Whew!

Shadow- "You bet not say one more word to neither one of us before I knock your azz out!"

Young man mumbled something under his breath. This infuriated Shadow who proceeded to square up his fists right in front of his face in a defensive stance and punched Young Man right in the nose. Young man's knees buckled and he fell to the ground. To add insult to injury, Shadow then stood over him and said these words (this is verbatim)-

"Now, go home and tell yo' homies you just got knocked out by a tranny!"

I. Was. Dead. My face melted, I half peed myself out of fear. I was done.

"You know what lady. That's ok. I have enough info to make a report. Please get in your car and try very very hard to drive carefully!"
"Baby."
"Yes ma'am."
"Please forgive me."
"I forgive you now please please get into your car and drive away! God bless!"

I got into my scraped up van and drove off praising God, it hadn't escalated any further. I did indeed called the police department and reported the incident I had witnessed. The dispatch operator seemed unaffected. Well I wasn't! That day I learned, people are crazy, and capable of doing some wild stuff; including myself.

  

Sunday Brunch- The Dishes Can Wait! Hang with God for a While

"On the seventh day God had finished his work of creation, so he rested from all his work."Genesis 2:2

It is Biblical and necessary to rest. I've taken my own advice and this is why I'm writing my Sunday Brunch on Tuesday. I hardly cleaned; didn't garden at all but it felt good! Too many times we get in such a hurry; so busy with the happenings of the day that we forget what is essential- God and abiding in His Word and examples. We live in a society where the mantra for many is "Go!Go!Go!" Go to work for a 15 hour day. Go pick up the kids from their umpteenth unnecessary and over-programmed day. Go to the mall. Go to a friend's house. Go volunteer at the local food kitchen. Go read Facebook statuses for 2 hours and wonder where your day went. Go blog about something. Go go go go go. Enough!

Sometimes we busy our lives so much, we forget to do things like talk to our bestest friend of all- God. We don't talk with him because we're so busy. We feel like we don't have time to be still before God so we can hear his voice. We busy ourselves to the extent that we don't have a moment to take out His Love Letter and read it; fill up on His Goodness. But we wonder why we're taxed; our spirits as barren as the Sahara.

Heller! Take a rest! This doesn't mean abandon your responsibilities; laid up on your couch with your belly hanging out and half a burrito stuffed in your mouth (although sometimes, that does sound like a good idea). Instead, I urge you to not busy your days with the urgent things of life  (I'd call it the hustle and bustle syndrome). Instead make sure you're getting the important stuff done like uhhhh, hanging with God. He does indeed want to hang with you. Then worry about the rest because it truly can wait.

I've fallen victim to the tyranny of the urgent  (this is a really amazing document introduced to me by Husband) many times. In an attempt to try and not fall into that trap again, I quit my teaching job last year (the urgency of money can make you do crazy things like drive 45 minutes for $20,000 a year in the name of ministry) and decided to instead, take a little pay cut, stay home and enjoy my family. The "urgent" has still tried to creep back in though. There are times I still feel the busyness. That's my indicator, I need more God and less activity. So this past week, I've worked and rearranged my schedule to make time to be still and rest before God.

Totally would've missed this masterpiece had I not slowed
down for the "important" verses the "urgent". Love my guys.

I had a very dear friend from college come in from out of town. It was good to joke and laugh and catch up and tease and be "girls" with one another. I needed her visit more than she'll ever know.  I got to show off my husband (so proud of him!) and take her to the firehouse and laugh at her being too scared to slide down the short pole (about 10ft). She put on my husband's gear and modeled. I was the photographer. There was a certain degree of whimsy I would've missed had I told her not to come and instead busied myself with church work, my growing business, or taking the time to write a blog entry. I chilled and it was totally worth it!

Yesterday Husband, Friend, and Other Friend went to a concert. I screamed at the top of my lungs, sang all the songs obnoxiously, cried out to God (it was a Christian band), screamed some more just because I could, and enjoyed the fact that I was in a seat receiving music worship rather than offering it up from behind a microphone. I needed that.

Tomorrow I'm off to an older friend's property in Nowheresville. I truly don't know the name of the town they live in but I'm ok with that. It adds to the adventure of their property. I'm sooooo excited. This friend/mentor has 30 acres, 2 ponds and her husband built a detached "mancave" that's more like a watchtower. I'll read and pray and walk the trails and eat good food and have good conversation. I'm sure to feel rested.

I'll get back from this little getaway and there will be a multitude of things to do and they will innocently try to pull my attention away from God. I will have to actively be aware to remain in God's presence; to not let my eye wander to cleaning house,  grocery shopping or a thousand other deaths by errands before I do the important things like hang with God.

"Do not be in a hurry to leave the king's presence. Do not stand up for a bad cause, for he will do whatever he pleases." Ecclesiastes 8:3

It would do your soul well to read Tyranny of the Urgent by Charles E. Hummel. It's super-short for all those who think you have limited time (like maybe 900 words). It will be good for you. That's it. That's all I got for ya. A couple of Bible verses and a short reading assignment ;) Enjoy and rest a little would ya? If you feel so inclined, leave a comment and let me know how you rested this week and how it worked out for you.

Sunday Brunch happens every Sunday as a spiritual encouragement for readers of the Fiery Wife blog. Come back next week and see what God is serving up for you to eat. "Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! (Ps. 34:8)"